The Daily Mail is a UK newspaper famous for a moralising obsession with teen sex and a tragic, long-term science impairment.
Most of their science stories are simply face-palm material but occasionally they produce unintentional works of comic genius.
Today, is one of those days.
Teenage sex ‘leads to bad moods’ in later life’
Having sex during teenage years could lead to bad moods, changes in brain development and smaller reproductive tissues, according to scientists.
Researchers from Ohio State University College of Medicine found that these changes can occur because the sexual experience is taking place while the brain is still developing.
Study co-author John Morris said: ‘Having a sexual experience during this time point, early in life, is not without consequence.’
The researchers based their conclusions after studying the behaviour of hamsters after they engaged in sexual activity.
Mind Hacks 
More promiscuous behavior in early life also increases you chances of pickup up micro-organisms like cytomegalovirus, Epstein-Barr virus, coxsackievirus B, parvovirus B19, which typically transmit through the respiratory route by saliva. All these viruses are linked to mood disorders such as anxiety, depression, irritability, and so forth.
More promiscuous behavior in early life also increases you chances of reproducing.
Also, coxsuckievirus B is possible to obtain with this behaviour.
Hip – the article is about the Daily Mail and hamsters. The “study” quoted by the Mail has not been peer-reviewed, or published. It was just talked about at a conference.
Apparently the “researchers” quoted by the Daily Mail made a number of completely unsupportable assumptions about the internal emotional states of the hamsters, cherry-picked their results to fit their assumptions and desired conclusions, and then linked their tiny and seriously flawed study to generalizations about teenaged humans.
Your note about the dangers of promiscuous kissing was very “Daily Mail”, thanks!
Sometimes it’s hard to tell if hamsters are feeling depressed – fortunately, researchers can always superimpose their feelings about watching hamsters have sex in those situations.
Ummm…I wonder if this applies to hamster-masturbation too? Has this been considered? One would expect scientific rigor here.
This report is ludicrous. We have substantial evidence that ancient human societies were getting married at rather young ages. How do we account for the larger brain size, knowing that many people back then were _married_ when they were ONLY teenagers ??? Obviously, people have not considered the absence of peer review(s) . . .
Oh jesus. HAMSTERS?