I can’t hold it any longer

Sometimes, medical case studies tell as much of a story by what they omit as by what they include. This sentence, from a recent case study published in the Canadian Journal of Urology, is one such example:

To complete the therapeutic approach, we focused also on the possible psychiatric implications of the self insertion of a foreign body into the urethra, and the initial evaluation reached the diagnosis of depression.

You may not be aware, but there are hundreds of cases in the medical literature of people ending up in hospital after putting objects in their cock or mimsy.

Allen key? Done. Pencil? Yes ma’am. Telephone cable? Hold the line. Plastic cup? At your service.

As far as I can tell, the matter has not been systematically studied, although hospital admissions seem to be most commonly linked to sex games that, excuse the pun, have got out of hand, or, are the unfortunate results of mental illness.

One interesting case from last year was reported in a chimpanzee. Do mention that next time you bump into an evolutionary psychologist. It should keep them busy for a while.

Link to PubMed entry for case study.

4 thoughts on “I can’t hold it any longer”

  1. I read a story once about a rather large woman who masturbated so hard with a plastic two liter soda bottle, the bottle ended up rupturing the posterior wall of her vagina, and the woman could not remove the bottle. This required surgical intervention.

    1. I also read a story about an older gentleman who suffered chronic constipation. He was told by a friend that sweet potatoes would cure his problem. So he goes out, gets the biggest sweet potato he can find–and sticks it in his rectum! He came in to the ER complaining his constipation was worse than ever. As he’s detailing his misadventure with the sweet potato, the gentleman suddenly grunted, bore down–and the sweet potato shot across the room, to the ER occupants’ great surprise!

  2. Not so fast with the chimpanzee – if I understand aright, the foreign body was grass – this happens with dogs (usually between digits, but not unknown in the penis) when grass seeds with backward-projecting feathering get stuck in the course of, e.g. a walk through long grass – they go up rather than down consequence. I’d hate to think chimpanzees were as stunned as their near relatives.

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